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I refuse to answer that question! The new (intimidating) college essay

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On January 25, 2012, someone on the College Confidential discussion group posted this thread:

Did you ever dump a college from your list because of the type (or number) of essays?College Essay Writing

Responses flooded in, mostly from parents of students who had indeed given up on an application because they were intimidated by the essay questions, and many from the students themselves.  One woman’s daughter dropped three applications and added one that had easier essay requirements. One aunt reported that her nephews applied to one school only – Iowa State – because the school did not require essays. And another self-proclaimed lazy procrastinator chose her colleges based on the ease of their essay requirements.

Colleges dropped by students ran the gambit and were headed up by Wake Forest and U Chicago:  Barnard, Brown (2x), BU, Bryn Mawr, Caltech, Carnegie Mellon, University of Chicago (8x), Claremont McKenna (3x), Columbia University (3x), CMC (2x), Cornell, University of Delaware, Duke, Elon, Georgetown, Grinnell (2x), Marquette Honors Program, University of Maryland, University of Michigan, MIT (2x), UNC (3x), Northwestern, Notre Dame (2x), NYU (2x), U Penn (3x), Princeton, Puget Sound, Rice (3x), Rutgers, Tufts (2x), Stanford (2x), Syracuse, UVA, Wake Forest (8x), and Yale (2x).

Why the aversion to unique essay topics?

I could rant about how students are lazy or haven’t received sufficient training in thinking for themselves or thinking creatively.  I could suggest that if our educational system did a better job on these fronts, and with teaching writing in general, students would not avoid writing essays that challenged them to invest time and thought.  I could also suggest that students don’t start their application process far enough ahead of time to ensure they have the time and attention for some uncommon essay questions.

All of those things might be true, but I am more interested in the schools’ logic behind asking unusual question such as “What does Play-Doh have to do with Plato?” (U Chicago), “What is your favorite ride at the amusement park?  How does this reflect your approach to life?” (Emory University), “Imagine you have to wear a costume for a year of your life.  What would you pick and why?” (Brandeis University), and “What would you do with a free afternoon tomorrow?” (Yale).

Why the inclination toward unique essay topics?

Colleges may be showing themselves to be current with the times, as suggested in The new college-admission essay: Short and tweet(ish).  Some applications ask for short essay answers of 25 words, such as “My favorite thing about last Tuesday” (University of Maryland), perhaps catering to the Twitter generation.  Tufts, George Mason and the University of Dayton allow prospective students to submit a video essay instead of a written one.  Students might jump at the chance to communicate in ways that are spreading like wildfire in the world of social media.

The right fit

In the College Confidential discussion, most students reported that they dropped schools not simply because of the essay requirements but because there was an additional reason the school was not a good fit.  Some were not excited about their on-campus visit.  Some realized when they were asked why they wanted to attend a particular school that they had no good reason.  Conversely, some students reported taking on writing difficult essays because a school was their clear first choice.  Some loved writing the very same essays that sent other students away (Wake Forest and Chicago essays included).  And one student actually rejected a school (Wash U in St. Louis) because they did not ask a supplemental essay question!  He thought the school was trying to increase its U.S. News rankings by encouraging applications.  Not surprisingly, two other students applied to Wash U (as well as to many other schools – Dartmouth, Harvard, and William & Mary to name a few) because of the simplicity of their essay requirements.

Perhaps colleges like Wake Forest and U Chicago are shooting themselves in the foot.  Several anecdotes appeared in the College Confidential discussion about students who got accepted into one school with a simple application (Harvard, for instance) while they were still working on essays for another school.  Schools with longer or more complex essay requirements might be losing some qualified and motivated students in addition to the ones who just don’t care enough to jump through the hoops.

Yet for most schools, it appears that they are doing a good job of weeding out applicants.  If an Honors application intimidates you, that’s a very good sign that you are not meant to be in that program.  If an essay challenge makes you realize that you’re not up for that challenge, regardless of the reason, then that school has done you and itself a favor.  What a great strategy for winnowing down the number of applications to a pool of students who will face an extra challenge or two because they want so much to go to a particular school.

As one member of College Confidential, stated, “Frankly, there are too many well-rounded, excellent students applying to the best universities to distinguish a select few without asking stranger, creative questions. It’s there that you begin to see a student’s personality and that’s what gets you in.”

 

Are essay questions scaring you away from a school?  Maybe it’s time to get some help.  If you want to brainstorm with a professional about what you could write in response to some of these wacky questions, contact The Essay Expert.  We’ll be happy to help.

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Posted in Articles by Brenda Bernstein, College Admissions, College Admissions Essay | 1 Comment »

The Essay Expert’s New Year’s “Ressaylutions”– Completing 2011 and Creating 2012

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Last year at about this time, I wrote a list of six New Year’s Ressaylutions for 2011.

Do you ever go back to your list from last year and check on whether you followed through on your resolutions, or whether you forgot about them the moment you put your pen down?

I realized that with all my talk about New Year’s resolutions, I hadn’t gone back to check last year’s list.  I got brave and dug it up this week; the following is a report on how I did at keeping my promises!  I also make new resolutions for 2012.

2011 Ressaylutions                      

1.  Convert my website to WordPress.

DONE!  Not only is my site fully converted to WordPress, but I also have a funky cool new slider on my home page. I also created many new forms and downloadable documents that make it easier for clients to submit information and get the materials they need.

2.  Make it easier for my readers to choose the topic they want to read about.

DONE!  I now have six separate e-lists:

a) Job Search (Resumes & Cover Letters)

b) College Admissions

c) LinkedIn & Professional Writing

d) Grammar Tips

e) Newsletter only

e) Everything.

Choose the one that’s “write” for you!

3.  Create autoresponders.

DONE!  And there is still so much more to do.  See Ressaylution #3.

4.  Guest blog.

DONE!  My articles have appeared on CareerCast.com, Careerealism.com, CareerCenterToolbox.com and ilostmyjob.com, and I was quoted in Forbes.  Recently I wrote two articles for an American Bar Association publication about resumes and personal statements for applying to law school which will be published this summer.

5.  Start an Artist’s Way group.

NOT DONE.  This one took a back seat to the business.  But I DID write my morning pages every day for three months like I said I would.  And I told everyone I was leading something, which made me act like a leader.  Perhaps that’s what inspired my article, Top 10 Ways to Be a Leader.  I’m content that this item did not come to fruition.

6.  Continue to write and share about writing issues, job search issues, and sometimes life issues that strike my fancy each week and that my readers care about.

DONE.  I faithfully published either a blog article or a newsletter EVERY week in 2011, without fail.  Now THAT’s something to celebrate!

Here are The Essay Expert’s Ressaylutions for 2012:

1.  Create a new template for my website that brings me more into the technology of 2012.

Despite my successful WordPress conversion, there’s much work still to be done before I have the ability to edit my pages without “breaking” the existing code.  Look out for a new, more user-friendly interface in 2012 too!

2.  Create new e-lists for past clients, and survey past clients.

I want to follow up better with The Essay Expert’s past clients and find out how they are faring with the documents we helped them prepare.  Did they get jobs?  Did they get into school?  Do they need more assistance?  My hope is that better e-lists will allow me to start providing concrete numbers about the results of the work that we do.  In service of this goal (as well as Ressaylution #3), I will be hiring a virtual assistant (VA)!  No more interns – The Essay Expert is getting down to business.

3.  Revise autoresponders from 2011.

Right now most of my autoresponders are set up as summaries of my articles with links to the full article. It turns out that people don’t like to have to click on a link to read a full article!  So I will be putting complete articles into my autoresponders for your reading convenience and pleasure.  Thank you to my future VA for helping with to make this happen!

4.  Publish my e-book on Kindle

This one is in the works.  It will have a cool new cover and a clickable index for easy reference.  Let’s make it a best-seller!

5.  Report on and count success stories in 2012.

My goal is to report 212 success stories in 2012.  My resolution is to keep doing great work and to keep marketing The Essay Expert’s offerings so we can create 212 positive results for job seekers, school applicants and businesses in the next year.  See 212 Success Stories for 2012.

6.  Continue to write and share about writing issues, job search issues, and sometimes life issues that strike my fancy each week and that my readers care about.

No change here.  I’ll see you every week in 2012.

How did you do on your New Year’s resolutions from 2011?  Do you dare to find out?

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Posted in Articles by Brenda Bernstein, Life and Leadership | 2 Comments »

LinkedIn says the 2011 most overused professional buzzwords in the United States are “creative,” “organizational” and “effective”

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On December 13, 2011, LinkedIn released its “most overused” buzzwords list for 2011.  Here is the list of the top 10, with “creative” reigning at the top.  When a particular country or countries stood out for overuse of a term, the country name(s) are listed in parentheses:2011 LinkedIn Overused buzzwords

 

  1. Creative (Australia, Canada, Germany, the Netherlands, the United Kingdom and the United States)
  2. Organizational
  3. Effective (India)
  4. Extensive experience
  5. Track record (Singapore)
  6. Motivated (Ireland)
  7. Innovative
  8. Problem solving (Italy)
  9. Communication skills
  10. Dynamic (France)

The good news?  Some people heeded last year’s list and stopped overusing at least some of the following 2010 Overused Buzzwords:

  1. Extensive experience
  2. Innovative
  3. Motivated
  4. Results-oriented
  5. Dynamic
  6. Proven track record
  7. Team player
  8. Fast-paced
  9. Problem solver
  10. Entrepreneurial

The four exact matches between 2010 and 2011 years are “motivated,” “dynamic,” “innovative” and “extensive experience.” There are also some near matches with “problem solving” vs. “problem solver” and “proven track record” vs. “track record” (I personally have tired of all of these terms).

I believe job seekers and career professionals have done some good work changing the landscape — four of the terms on the list have changed, and all of them have changed rank.   Let’s face it:  There will be overused words every year.  I’m just glad to see we’re learning lessons along the way.

How Creative are You?

This year’s primary lesson:  Don’t say you are “creative” – demonstrate your creativity!  Design and upload a PowerPoint presentation to SlideShare and post it to your LinkedIn profile.  Give examples of marketing strategies you devised.  Include your artistic portfolio in your profile.  And don’t use the same words everyone else is using!  We now know that asserting you are “creative” is a sure way to prove that you are not.

Met or Exceeded Organizational Goals?

“Organizational” is a bit tougher.  How do you say you met organizational goals without saying you met organizational goals?  One thing to keep in mind is that of course you are going to strive for and meet organizational goals!  What other goals would you possibly want to report?  I admit I will be a little sad to let this term go, but I see the point of finding alternatives.  “Meet targeted goals” would be just as effective (oh did I say “effective”?  Send me to India where I’ll be in good company!)  Or perhaps a chart of goals vs. accomplishments would obviate the need for the term “organizational.”  I predict that next year “goal(s)” and “target(s)” will top this list.

Devise an Effective Strategy Lately?

Thankfully there are a multitude of ways to convey the concept of “effective.”  “Successful” is the clearest alternative, followed by “winning,” “profitable,” “lucrative,” “productive,” “fruitful,” “targeted” and even “efficacious” (I don’t love that last one as a resume/profile adjective).  Take your pick or find another way to say what you mean!  (Sometimes you can just leave out the adjective completely, as I did by avoiding “find another effective way” in that last sentence.)

As for “extensive experience” and “track record,” these terms are like nails on a blackboard to me.  I see them a lot and make short work of them on my resumes.

How many of these top 10 overused words show up in your profile?  Please share below.

And  if you want expert assistance to craft a LinkedIn profile that stands out in a sea of 135 million LinkedIn users, contact The Essay Expert through our Web Form or at 608-467-0067.

Like this article?  You might also enjoy Ten Buzzwords to Take Off Your LinkedIn Profile Now published by Time Newsfeed.

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Posted in Articles by Brenda Bernstein, Job Search, LinkedIn, Social Media | 2 Comments »

2 Most Common Luxury Hotel Grammar Errors

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In July I wrote an article about phrasal verbs in response to a card in my hotel room that referred to an option to “workout” (one word – improper) instead of “work out” (2 words – proper) in the comfort of your own room.

Since then I have discovered that the Hilton Garden Inn is not the only hotel to make this error.  While considering a possible stay at the Hyatt Regency in Baltimore, I found this sentence:

“For those who choose to workout in the privacy of their spacious guestroom, we offer YogaAwayTM.”

The Hyatt’s advertising team made the exact same error as the Hilton’s.  Coincidence?

Hotel Helter Skelter

Here’s a strange thing:  Just for fun, I Googled “Hyatt workout” and discovered that the Hyatt is not consistent across its websites.  The Sarasota Hyatt Regency offers:

“If you choose to work out in the privacy of your own hotel room or suite at Hyatt Regency Sarasota, we offer YogaAway™.”

Sarasota got it right!

I wonder who is responsible for this mismatched spelling?  Why is Hyatt messaging not consistent between Baltimore and Sarasota?  I’ve always thought the draw of a hotel chain is the reassurance that you will get the same consistent service no matter where in the world you go.  The discrepancies on the Hyatt’s websites make me think perhaps their other amenities are not consistent either.

More then [sic] words… marriott hotel grammar errors

In the meantime, I have ventured on to yet another institution of hospitality:  a Marriott resort in Palm Desert, California.  Marriott evidently cares about energy conservation and therefore put out the following request:

“In an effort to conserve water and energy, would you please consider using your towel more then once.”

I don’t know about you, but my grammar checker even caught this one!  The correct statement would have been:

“In an effort to conserve water and energy, would you please consider using your towel more than once.”

There are some other grammatical issues with this sentence, but I’ll let them be for now.  Do you see the other issue here?  If you do, please share in the comments.

I recall seeing a similar message in another hotel … I’m not sure which one, but I believe the word “than” was properly used or I probably would have blogged about it.

Wouldn’t it be nice if hotels could all get their grammar as straight and smooth as their bed sheets?

Judging a book by its blunders?

And by the way, even though this Marriott is a resort-level establishment, a level “6” which is pretty high in the Marriott pecking order, the round piece on the top of my bathroom sink drain was detached when I got to the room, and there was a stray peanut hiding under my very expensive flat screen TV.  Maybe grammar blunders really are an indication of deeper quality and performance issues?

What do you think?  Have you found a hotel grammar blunder of late?  What would you suggest to these institutions that would keep them consistent and grammatically correct?  And how much do you judge a service provider based on the consistency and correctness of its message?

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Posted in Articles by Brenda Bernstein, Grammar Tips, Grammar Tips | 6 Comments »

Thanksgiving, Variety and the 6 Human Needs

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Turkey, gravy, stuffing, cranberry sauce, sweet potatoes, pumpkin pie AND whipped cream. The essential elements to the perfect Thanksgiving meal. We all know that one of the best things about Thanksgiving dinner is the sheer variety of the spread.Thanksgiving Variety and 6 Human Needs

This Thanksgiving I found myself thankful for the variety that is present in my life—and for a richness that extends beyond the Thanksgiving table.

Variety is identified by Anthony Robbins as one of the Six Human Needs. I have been aware for a long time that variety is important to me—and have even found that I crave monotony from time to time to break up the variety! The need for participating in diverse activities has been at the source of my business model: I have created a job for myself where a mix of projects shows up daily.

For instance, in one single day this week, here were just a few tasks I tackled:

  1. Spent two hours on the phone with the GM (General Manager) of an international manufacturing company in China, perfecting his resume and learning about factories in China.
  2. Edited the homepage for The Wisdomkeeper Connection LLC (I pulled out my women’s spiritual training for this one!)
  3. Edited a research report on barriers to career advancement for women and people of color and how those barriers can be overcome through effective networking (yes I took women’s studies in college!).
  4. Provided material to the author of Social Networking Job Search for Dummies, Joshua Waldman, for use in a coupon book he will be distributing on his book tour.
  5. Stuffed 187 holiday letters to past clients (ah…  a repetitive task).
  6. Spoke with two new resume writers who will be joining The Essay Expert team.

Yes, I have a LOT of variety in my work. As far as I’m concerned, the more different types of projects I can work on the better.  While this inclination makes it hard to target a niche market, it seems to work for me.

Variety is a close sibling to richness, and I appreciate that my life is rich as well as varied. Spending time with family over the holidays was a wonderful way to learn about where I came from and to enjoy the next generation for who they are (and are becoming). I am thankful that I can take my work with me so that I never have to worry about missing business-related messages as I celebrate the holidays.Flowers and sun

With computer and cell phone in tow, I can go almost anywhere any time—and never run out of vacation days! This capability opens up many opportunities for a rich and fulfilling life, whether it’s attending workshops, spending time with family, or just exploring a new locale.

In January I will be traveling to New York for a week to support my mom who is having elective surgery. That trip will add to the variety and richness in my life, as well as meet four more of the 6 Human Needs: Significance, Connection/Love, Growth and Contribution.

Who could ask for anything more?

——–

I’d love to hear how you generate variety and richness in your life. What are you creating as the New Year approaches?  Please share below!

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Posted in Articles by Brenda Bernstein | 2 Comments »

How to Write a Resume that Beats the Computers

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Your Resume:  Humans vs. Computers

When I give webinars on writing resumes, one of the topics I cover is how to make your resume visually appealing.  I often get this question:

Why would I want to spend so much time and money making my resume pretty if it’s just going to confuse the computers?

My answer is that yes, the computers are important, and that you ALSO need to have a resume that’s designed to be read by human beings.  We all know that you are most likely to find your job through networking or the “hidden job market.” When you send materials to someone in your network or to a decision-maker in the hidden job market, you want to include a professional-looking resume.  And when it’s time for an interview, it’s also advisable to have a nicely formatted resume to hand across the table.

For those of you who are hoping to get those interviews by applying online, the question still remains: How can I write a resume that makes it past the computers?  In other words:  How can I raise my odds above 2%?

Keep reading.

There are two issues with submitting online resumes.  One is the format of the resume; the second is the keywords it contains.

Formatting for Robots:

ATS (Applicant Tracking System) software is not the smartest software in the world.  It gets confused by bullets, non-traditional headings, graphs, tables, and text boxes.  So you need to have a version of your resume that is stripped down and organized just for the computers. We call this your “text-based” resume.

Your text-based resume should follow these guidelines:

  1. Create it in (or copy it into) a text editor such as Notepad, SimpleText or TextEdit.
  2. Use easily understandable headings like “Summary of Qualifications,” “Professional Experience” and “Education.”
  3. Don’t get fancy or creative with your headings, and don’t put two categories together in one section.  Do NOT, for instance, use the heading “Education & Certifications” or “Skills & Interests.”
  4. Use dashes or asterisks instead of bullets.
  5. List your address in standard “tombstone” style, one line on top of the next.
  6. Put spaces between sections.

Here’s what your text-based resume might look like (beautiful, isn’t it?):

 

Robots Beat Robots

Now, you’ve done your best to create a resume the computers will understand.  But how will you know if it really worked?

The best way to find out what a computer understands and what it doesn’t is to use a computer program that tells you.  Thankfully, there is a service where you can put your resume into a box on your computer screen, and the program will tell you what information is recognized and not recognized by the ATS software.

Here’s where you can find out about it:

How will you know what keywords to use in your resume?

Just because the computers can read your resume doesn’t mean you will have the right keywords to make it past their screening systems. Perhaps counter-intuitively, the keywords that truly make a difference with computer scanners are the ones you have on your resume that not everyone else includes.  Preptel’s service (called “Resumeter™”) will tell you what those unique words are so that you can add them to your resume.  All you have to do is paste a job description onto the page, and you will get a list of the keywords you MUST include in your resume for it to be viable.

Example:  One of my clients was applying for a job with INTUIT.  When I put his resume and job description into the Resumeter™, the resume was rated as “Weak.” I discovered that he needed to have certain keywords in his resume, including the phrase “QuickBooks, Quicken.”  We added a line about how eager he was to market QuickBooks, Quicken and other INTUIT software through compelling graphic design.  His Resumeter™ grade changed from “Weak” to “Strong.”

Without using Preptel, this client wouldn’t have stood a chance.  As you know, the online job search market is highly competitive and statistics are not encouraging.  You can change your odds of making it past the ATS systems with just a few clicks and adjustments.

Please do yourself a favor and try out this service, Preptel’s Resumeter™, for 7 days for free.  It is normally $25/month after that but with the link provided here it is only $19.99/month.

I have no doubt that you have great experience that qualifies you for many positions. If the computer can’t understand and rank it properly, it won’t help you a bit. Please check out Preptel and let me know what difference it makes!

 

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Posted in Articles by Brenda Bernstein, Job Search, Resume Tips | No Comments »

The Morality of Using College Essay Consultants

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I’m inspired today to address a sticky topic:  the moral issues around getting help with your personal statement/essays for college or MBA admissions.

Let me start by saying that The Essay Expert’s college essay consultants and MBA admissions consultants do NOT write essays for college and business school applicants.  When I get calls requesting that service (and I do get those calls), I have no problem turning down the business.

What Do We Do?personal statement writing

What do we do at The Essay Expert?  We coach.  We explore ideas.  We help applicants see what is unique about them and their life experiences.  We draw connections.  We suggest directions to take, layers to add, and ways to best impress an admissions committee.  Sure, we also might suggest a few grammatical or organizational corrections.  But in the end, the essay is ALWAYS the client’s essay, NOT ours.

Still, there are people who are troubled by the concept of what we do.  Here’s a comment I received after posting a request for a college essay coach:

“… I find this topic/”profession” very troublesome. It’s a slippery slope from coaching a young person about choosing a topic and format and helping them focus to, in effect, writing it for them or do such extensive edits that it’s no longer the student’s PERSONAL essay. Yes, I’m sure there are essay consultants that put on the brakes, and this one could be one of them, but a position description that is so blatant about the role (“…take a drab college application essay and turn it into gold!”) … gives me pause. I’m not naive – far from it – but of all the pieces in the college application package subject to “help”, the essay should be the most sacrosanct.”

The concerns expressed here are my concerns as well, and my promise is that The Essay Expert does not go down that slippery slope.  Yes, I promise to turn the drab into gold, but by asking key questions of the applicant – not by writing the essay.

The NYT and The WSJ Chime In

Not long after receiving the above comment, I also came across a New York Times article, Crafting an Application Essay That ‘Pops’, which related the results of a conference attended by nearly 5,000 admissions officers and counselors.  The group, which included professors, admissions officers, and other college administrators, offered nine pieces of practical advice for writing personal statements.  I was happy, and frankly relieved, to see “Have an editor. All panelists advised having a close, trusted editor and an objective, outside reader.”

Soon after, an article came out in The Wall Street Journal with a similar message to M.B.A. applicants:  In Looking for an Edge:  MBA applicants are turning to pricey consultants to help them navigate the daunting admissions process , The WSJ reports that 20% of admitted students say they used an M.B.A. admissions advisor in the application process.  Furthermore, the article relates, “As the consulting industry has grown, some business schools have become more accepting of it.” In fact, the managing director of M.B.A. admissions and financial aid at Harvard Business School uses admissions consultants as a resource “to ‘get some field intelligence’ about how prospective students view the school and its admissions process.”

The Difference We Make

It is unquestionable that having a talented editor can give applicants an edge.  And not everyone has a family member, guidance counselor or close friend who can serve as an editor or consultant.  That’s where The Essay Expert comes in.  Indeed, what we offer that a friend or relative cannot, is an objective eye and the perspective of someone who has read dozens, if not hundreds, of essays.  We will make sure your essay does not sound like anyone else’s.

It is especially difficult to find a reliable advisor for M.B.A. admissions, where very specialized knowledge of business schools and their admissions processes is key to choosing the right essay focus and application strategy. In fact, one of our recent clients had enrolled several business school graduate friends to review his essays, yet still required ten hours of our consultant’s time to retool just two of his essay sets.

Lingering Questions

I understand there is still an issue present.  What about people who don’t know someone who can help, and who also can’t afford to hire someone? I am concerned about that point myself, and do provide assistance to a limited number of clients for a reduced fee or some type of trade.  I don’t believe I have been contacted by anyone thus far whom I turned away solely due to lack of ability to pay.

I’m curious to hear your thoughts on this topic. Admissions officers seem to have accepted that many applicants use paid consultants to assist them with the admissions process. Does this fact allay any of the concerns you might have had?

I believe The Essay Expert provides an extremely valuable service and that we do not cross the ethical line that would have students presenting an essay that is not theirs. And we do help students transform pedantic or blah essays into stories that capture the hearts and minds of the admissions committee.

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Posted in Articles by Brenda Bernstein, College Admissions, College Admissions Essay, Grad School Admissons | 5 Comments »

The Gift of a Wedding Roast

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This weekend I went to Massachusetts for the wedding of a dear friend of mine.  It was the only wedding ceremony I’ve ever been to where I laughed until I cried for part of it, and simply cried for the rest.  I was deeply moved by the love between this couple, and by the sentiments of their close friends and family who were given an opportunity to share during the ceremony.

Between traveling and spending time with friends, I did not have much of an opportunity to craft a blog article.  I did, however, write something very important:  a rhyming wedding toast/roast.  I thought I would share it with you, if nothing else as an example of how to tell a story in a short space.  As you read, pay attention to what details are shared, what is left to the imagination, and how connections are drawn between earlier and later couplets.

I acknowledge my father, who is no longer with us in body, but who inspired me by his example to write poems such as these.  Here’s the toast/roast, a bit about what transpired from sharing it, and a few things you might learn from my experience.

 

Wedding Toast/Roast – September 25, 2011

 

At DNE Camp, a story began

Of Leslie (our bride) and Gary (our man).

They met at a table across from each other,

(Leslie freed up from her duties as mother)

And gazed, and gazed, and gazed some more.

Then brought their flirtations onTO the dance floor.

 

They danced, and they talked…  for hours they flirted…

This bond that they had just could not be averted.

But no matter how well she and Gary were matched,

Leslie preferred to stay unattached.

This line gave the couple a fairly fine start:

“You CAN have my body but NEVER my heart.”

 

But Gary was sure there was still more to gain.

They rendezvoused once on a Turnpike in Maine

And yes, since that meeting 15 years ago,

A lot has transpired…  as many here know.

There were moves, there were moods, there were protests and OH

There were bondings with dogs – the world’s cutest, you know.

 

A year’s separation, and a new job for Gary,

All served to bring forth the real chance they would marry.

An engagement took shape, and a life more entwined.

It seems that for union this pair was designed.

And I hear Bucket’s heart shouting “Never say never!”

‘Cause Gary’s sure got it…  forever.

[Note:  "Bucket" is Gary's nickname for Leslie; capitalized letters indicate emphasis]

Unexpected Results

I read this poem to a crowd of 125 wedding guests, and had a lot of people ask me about what I do for a living.  One long-time acquaintance asked me if I wrote the poem myself, surprised to find out that I was a writer!  I had the opportunity to share about my resume writing, jokingly telling one of the wedding guests that I write rhyming resumes.

I let people know about my more creative resumes, including one that was nominated for a TORI Award in the Best Creative Resume Category.  One wedding guest asked for my card, telling me she was interested in hiring me to help both her and her husband with their resumes.  Another guest has a daughter applying to college, and was thrilled to meet an “Essay Expert” who offers help with personal statements for college!

 

The Gift of Creative Expression

I wrote this wedding poem because I love my friend Gary and had a TON of fun writing and reading it.  Not once did it cross my mind that the poem would lead to business.  Yet that’s exactly what it did.  The experience reminds me that by being yourself, by giving, and by sharing who you are with others, you can obtain unexpected results.

Whether you are a business person or a job seeker, keep putting yourself out there and giving your gifts.  If you have a story to tell, tell it.  You never know who might be listening.

–

I invite you to share any wedding toasts or roasts you have written you are particularly proud of…  or to share an experience of getting an unexpected result just by being/sharing yourself.

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Posted in Articles by Brenda Bernstein, Writing Tips | 3 Comments »

Have you done things because you *should* even though you didn’t *want* to? How did it go?

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This week I watched the film “Temple Grandin,” a true story about a brilliant – and socially outcast – autistic girl.  Temple’s mother forced her to go to college, despite Temple’s desire to work on a ranch instead.  In this case, the mother’s insistence turned out to be best thing that could have happened to Temple.  She went on to get a Masters Degree and to become a professor of Autism and Animal Science at Colorado University.

This movie was timely because I had just been interviewed for an article, published in Forbes, entitled Students Unhappy With College Options Weigh Transfer vs. Gap Year.  A “gap year” is a year off between high school and college, and students who choose to take this year off fall into two categories.  Some are up to great things in the world – training for the Olympics, trekking in Nepal, studying marine life on the barrier reef.  These students have a passion that they want to pursue and college takes second seat to these dreams.

The other category would have preferred to go straight to college, but they do not get admitted to a school they want to attend.  Should they go to their “safety” school or spend a year doing something else, hoping they will have better luck next year?

 

What if my child wants to take a year off?

If you’re the parent of a student considering a gap year, and if you strongly believe she should go to a safety school rather than take a year off, see if you can get her to come to that decision herself.  As I stated in the Forbes article, I believe that forcing a teenager to go to a school she thinks she’ll hate can be a recipe for disaster.  I believe Temple Grandin was the exception rather than the rule.

 

Life’s Unpredictability

Many students who do attend schools that were not on the top of their list end up having a great time (as attested to by Carolyn Mulligan, College Admissions Consultant). I believe most of these students came to the decision themselves to attend a less than perfect school. I have experienced this type of phenomenon myself; when I first started my business, I thought I would hate marketing.  Guess what?  It’s my favorite part of my job!

On the flip side, sometimes you think you will love something only to find out it was not the right fit after all.  This happened to me as well: I thought I’d like being a lawyer, and discovered it was not the perfect fit I had imagined.

Do your research!

For high school seniors, before jumping in to what looks like an undesirable situation, and before saying a definite no, visit the school.  Speak to students.  Sit in on classes. Maybe even stay overnight and eat breakfast in the cafeteria or dining hall.  If at all possible, find out what it’s like to be there.  Then make your decision.

If you do decide to take a year off, make it a valuable year.  Learn something you wouldn’t have learned in college.  Gain life experience.  Become more of the person you want to be.  If you can do any of those things, in my opinion, you will not only be a better college candidate the following year, but you will be a more fulfilled human being.

Have you ever accepted an offer for a job or school admission that you thought you would love and ended up hating?  Or discovered you didn’t fit as well as you thought you would in a job or a school?  What’s your advice for students facing these decisions?

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Posted in College Admissions | No Comments »

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